Sunday, December 12, 2010

Advice

I've had a little thought i'd like to share. Some words of advice...which just so happen to deal with just that. Advice. This concept has intrigued me for the last little bit as I have received much, as well as have given some in my day.

Advice is something everyone thinks they are good at giving, which they just may be; however, at times, it is the very last thing one wants to hear from a person...even in a time or sorrow or hurt.

Everyone is ready to tell you this or that, that they know how you feel, that time will heal all (one of my most hated phrases...cause, OF COURSE I know that in time things will be alright. Life isn't meant to be miserable and sad. I know everyone goes through crap. I know that one day we all will be happy. I have faith in this. A lot of faith. I just don't want to hear it when at the moment life sucks).

Now, don't get me wrong. Many times we ask for it and certain advice is very much needed and helpful. But honestly, what is it that everyone is really asking for? Its for someone to just LISTEN. Someone to vent to, cry on or just whatever. And then after all the chaos has settled, you can look at the other person and smile and say nothing. Knowing you both have had crappy days. Knowing you both have been sad. Just being able to have some listen will solve it all. Just say I understand, I am here for you and hug it out.

I know I have plenty to say when it comes to relationships. But, does that make me an expert in relationships? NO! Does that make me understand what you are going through? Maybe. Bottom line is, whatever I have to say is BLAH BLAH BLAH, I've been through this and that and some more blah. But all I am really saying is, "I understand...I have had some crappy days in my life to, do you want me to tell you how I got through them?" Now, the words I speak may be comforting. But its the actual listening that does the trick.

Our culture is prone to it. We pray to God and tell him our thoughts and and our feelings. Believing and having faith that he is listening. Do we hear Him talk back to us? Does He give us council? Does He give us advice? Not really. What He DOES do, is comforts us, He calms our soul, He gives peace to our decisions, these and other similar feelings let us know it will all be alright.

Now, don't get me wrong. I 100 percent believe that God gives us revelation. That we do receive advice from scriptures and prophets and leaders of the church. And these things can be answers to our prayers. We should seek these things out constantly. But in my experience (here's my advice) I have come to love and cherish my Heavenly Father who ALWAYS listens to me gripe, cry, laugh, and share my life. He doesn't tell me any story about his life, or back when he had this problem. He just listens, and it is so comforting to know that he does. And I think we should all take a lesson from His example. That when someone needs someone to talk to...let them talk, forget about yourself for a moment and just listen. This will make a world of difference. This is what most of us really want.

Am I right?

Also, If someone ASKS for advice, well then by all means, spill your heart out...but make sure thats really what the person wants to hear.

Also, also: Do you like that this whole posting was me giving advice. HA! I make myself laugh.